How to get it home the first time Part IIB -- the best government money can buy

[BG6]

You KNOW the DISCLAIMER still applies -- anything I tell you might be wrong.

Okay, so there it is:  "ALL TRUCKS ENTER SCALES" and a smaller sign "Buses and Rental Trucks Must Enter Scales When Open" . . .

This is the first moment of truth.

If your coach still looks like a coach, and you pass the scale, you might find yourself explaining to a state trooper a few miles down the road.  If you go into the scale without all of the stickers they want to see, you will find yourself explaining to the tax collector in the scalehouse.

OTOH, if it has a bunch of half-obliterated stickers on the side, it's obviously not in service.

Now you start to wish you had paid someone else to move it, or that you had taken the time to hang some skins over the windows and paint them (this really doesn't take a lot of time, and all you need are the metal sheet, a drill, screws and some spray paint to match the main color of the coach)!

YOU have to make the decision. 

If you pass the scale and get stopped, then you throw yourself on the mercy of the trooper's common sense.  You show him the sales paperwork, the permit and insurance form, a pile of dismounted seats, your cot, and bleat "It's a motor home conversion, I didn't think I needed to stop."

The cop now has two options.  First, he or she can hand the paper back to you (and maybe a citation), and let you go.  The alternative is that he can for a big rig tow to impound your coach.   The trooper then will have to go in front of the judge with you and explain why he did it.  This may not be any more comfortable for him than for you, because the judge might throw it all out based on your explanation.  Faced with this possibility, most troopers will decide that it's better to chase speeders than to spend an hour babysitting your coach until the hook comes, but SOME WILL ARREST YOU AND IMPOUND YOUR COACH.

If you go into the scale, you are dealing with people whose sole purpose in life is to collect money.  They have the ability under law to hold your coach AND YOU until you cough up the money, perhaps hundreds of dollars, to pay your bail or fine IN CASH.

While you are there, they may also inspect your coach and cite you for any minor deficiency, such as a marker light that doesn't work, or "oil leak."

Whichever choice you make, you may have to make the decision several times, so it's worth avoiding the scales as best you can, just to save yourself the worry and hassle.  However, if you go into a scale even ONE TIME, you have to go into ALL of them -- the scales swap information, so you can't claim that you didn't know you had to, after having been spotted at the first one.  The only exception is if the signs include RVs or "all vehicles" over a certain weight or size without excluding RVs.

No matter who you are talking to, refer to your coach as a "Motor home conversion."  If you call it a bus, even one time, you are acknowledging it as a commercial vehicle.  Answer "Is that your bus out there?" with "You mean the motor home conversion?" 

If possible, get the seller to put this on the bill of sale.  If their ad says anything about converting to an RV, carry a copy of the ad with the RV parts highlighted.  Carry display ads, torn out of RV magazines, of professional coach conversions, especially if they are using the same shell that you're driving.  Say something like "The only way I'll ever be able to have anything like this is to build it myself, and this is the first part."

Essentially, you want to give the cop every possible excuse for deciding that you're a motor home, this not covered by commercial vehicle codes.  Most of them will do that, because dealing with you is a waste of their time, but you have to provide the keys that they need.

Another thing that you can do is to put RV bumper stickers and emblems on the coach.  Personalize it a little, in a way that no company would do.  Cutesy license plates that say "Dad's pad when Mom's mad," "Poorhouse on Wheels" or the like go a long way toward getting the cop or the weighmaster to look past you for the next target.  The more personal the better.

So, now we've covered hitting the road, buying fuel, and dealing with the government.  Anything else, you wonder? 

Oh, yeah, there sure is . . .in Part IIC . . .