Today Dallas quit the board, we've lost one of the most experienced detroit guys around and one of the most willing to help others and a friend. Why did it happen? It's simple, too much infighting and too much arguing, I came here from RV.Net cause they had a rule, do it their way or be wrong, here I found the freedom to do things differently and the encouragement to try. Dallas will probably be mad at me for posting this but each and everyone one of us is to blame, what ever happened to the close knit bunch of guys that would give each other helll and then get the job done, when a person was broke down on the road, it was a race to see who could get their first to help, now the discussion turns to which road coverage is best, who gives a rats behind if the democrats or the republicans are in power and maybe it'll not be good for us, did we care before? NO, what we cared about was each other and buses. It's a sad day in my opinion and I feel terrible for any way I may have contributed to it. I don't care how a person chooses to shift the blame, we all are guilty and I'd like to see him come back, flame if you want, thats ok, I'll still miss him and I'll have a spot in my yard for him and cat for anytime they want and for as long as they want. This is more than loosing a member, it's loosing a friend.
This is indeed sad news! I agree with your statement cody. Maybe after things cool down, we'll have the pleasure of his company again!
I hate it when we loose anybody, especially one with so much knowledge. :'(
Paul
Cody-let's not put the entire blame on the board here. Dallas has made some rather cutting remarks about me and my conversion without my mentioning him by name. Some people are confrontational and like to create waves-I think we could put Dallas into that category. I will miss Dallas's knowledge, but not his sharp tongue. Good Luck, TomC
Tom, is it a posibility that he was right? that your possibly not the final word?, think about it, I've found many people that have questioned your information, I don't know enough to know if your right or not but have noticed that it's very hard for you to be questioned, we all need to deal better with that aspect.
Been there done that.
On Many Days the keyboard is not your friend.
This stuff happens when someone poses or posts an authoritarian view of stuff
and even though disclaimers are many there still can be a friction-factor.
There does tend to be those "I don't want to hear that! " type of messages and sometimes all the good that an article may intend is not accepted widely without a lean towards the old battle lines of " I know more than You do! "
Sometimes the flaw is not in the actual text but more in how something is interpreted and the context of understanding.
Ok, Now I will crawl back in my hole and shutup...
That is too bad!!! We will miss him! I wonder what was the final blow to that? Surely it wasn't the "air brakes" thread. I got a little upset about that, but I didn't think that it was too bad. Sure he had some problems, but we all have problems. We wouldn't be human if we didn't have at least a problem or two, and I know I have a lot more than one or two problems in my life.
Maybe he will come back....It is too bad when people get their feelings hurt, and leave in a huff....
You are right about being able to accept questions, Cody. That is how we learned about Sam Walker. After dropping our bus off at his place that day, we were at the hotel that night waiting to fly out the next morning. We emailed him with a couple questions and concerns we had, and he emailed us back boiling mad what we would question him for any reason. He ended the email by telling us to "come get your bus" and he threatened to call the highway patrol on us for something, and I can't remember what the reason was (of course we told him to call the HP, and we didn't mind a bit....somehow he changed his mind ;D).
So, I agree Cody. One should be able to accept questions or criticisms. Of course, it helps if the questions are not unkind, but still....
God bless,
John
It can get very frustrating trying to help here when you been there and done that and people tell you you don't know what you are talking about.
I have been thinking about just reading and not posting anyway Dallas and Cat have a spot at my house anytime with 50amp service and the AZ sunshine and heat.
good luck
Your right Cody, it is a sad day. I have backed away somwwhat as well, although I have had no direct insults or whatever directed towrds me. As you said many conversations seem to stray away from the bus issues. I have been reading a lot more and posting less, filtering the information out in my head. A person quickly learns whom has the experience and who's advice a person should lean towards. All that other stuff is disgarding in my head although when something is directed towards one individual it takes alot of self disipline not not to get caught up in some meaningless pissing contest. Dallas I will miss your posts here. I don't believe we have had many direct conversations, however your knowledge that has been shown with other memebers had helped me out immensely.
Grant
Hi Folks,
As a Moderator, I'm gonna tell you all again, IT'S A HARD JOB.....Weather you respect that or not, it doesnt pay a dime and you have to love
dealing with folks when they get out of hand. It's not fun being the bad guy! BUT, the rewards of helping folks out have no price tag!
Give Dallas a breather and let hin heal. He is a very valuable asset to this board.. We can't let him walk! So, everybody just cool down!
That's all I have to say for now but, I will be behind the scenes working on this.
Nick-
Paula & I have known Dallas & Cat for many years and have camped together with them on several occasions. We will miss Dallas & Cat on the Board.
Communicating in writing is so much different than communicating in person. When communicating in writing, there is no body language to read and the written message can usually be perceived in many different ways depending on who is reading it. Also, many people will write stuff they would not say to you face to face.
It is always sad to loose very knowledgeable people from the Board. Although I rarely feel "attacked", I would not let that make me leave the Board. If I left, I would feel that I just let the attacker win, and that ain't gonna happen.
Maybe it is the economy or just the times we are livin' in, but it seems so many people are more easily upset and more confrontationable if someone disagrees with them. There are always more than 1 way to "skin a cat" and if someone else has a different way, that does not make them wrong. My feeling is that no one has a right to tell me how to do something, just as I do not have a right to tell them how to do something. I will listen to suggestions or give suggestions, but they are just that, suggestions, take em' or leave em'. But let's still be friends. Jack
PS: Just want to add to what Nick said, as moderators, we are sometimes "damned if we do & damned if we don't". We get PMs asking us to delete messages because that person was offended by the message. If we delete the message, we get PMs asking why that message was deleted, because the writer did not feel it was offensive. Maybe some need a little thicker skin and some some need to review their post before posting.
It is sad when someone packs up their toys & leaves. . . .
Sometimes, a vacation is needed.
The GREAT thing about this board is the welcome that is waiting for the return.
There are many advantages to working thru differences in opinions. I've learned much from discussing stuff with people who don't agree with me.
There are many here I have had opposing opinions with, but they are welcome to 30A & a level spot to park at my house, & to share a meal or two.
For most people, you only see the tip of the iceberg, there's lots going on that you don't see. . . .
This doesn't sound like the Dallas I know, hopefully things will get better.
Life is short & I'm too lazy to carry a grudge.
Have some dessert. ;D
One of the greatest assets this board had and still has is the openness and ability for a person to throw out an idea and watch it develope, in the short time I've been here I've seen people discuss splitting a bus down the middle and widening it, I've seen people discuss engine swaps and what all could be done, lately it seems when a subject like an engine swap or tranny swap comes up it's more about why it can't be done than how to do it, I read threads that suggested flipping axles, shortening drive shafts, everything from tilt wheels to cutting massive holes in the bus sides for slides and stuff, people even modified cars to tuck into the bays, the sky was the limit, if you could dream it, then it could be done, what ever happened to that, we need to get back to the foundation that brought this great group of misfits together, the ability to do what nobody else dreamed of. We've lost too many good people. Lets try to get back to what started the board and why it started.
A lot of talent has left the board never to return and I miss that and yep I even miss Ace but the back ground deal was to much for him I guess.
I would even miss JohnEd if he left and I never know what he talking about LOL.
Jack and Kyle pretty much said it all.
good luck
Quote from: JackConrad on August 19, 2009, 07:53:44 AM
Communicating in writing is so much different than communicating in person. When communicating in writing, there is no body language to read and the written message can usually be perceived in many different ways depending on who is reading it. Also, many people will write stuff they would not say to you face to face.
It is always sad to loose very knowledgeable people from the Board. Although I rarely feel "attacked", I would not let that make me leave the Board. If I left, I would feel that I just let the attacker win, and that ain't gonna happen.
Maybe it is the economy or just the times we are livin' in, but it seems so many people are more easily upset and more confrontationable if someone disagrees with them. There are always more than 1 way to "skin a cat" and if someone else has a different way, that does not make them wrong. My feeling is that no one has a right to tell me how to do something, just as I do not have a right to tell them how to do something. I will listen to suggestions or give suggestions, but they are just that, suggestions, take em' or leave em'. But let's still be friends. Jack
Jack,
I couldn't agree more or stated it better!
It seems at a minimum to be pervasive right now, the reasons are many and no doubt vary by the individual.
There are many ways to disagree, without being disagreeable, plenty of ways to make your point without belittling others.
I hope Dallas gets back on this BBS soon, hes a good guy who's helped out many on here, I don't care why he left, I don't want to gossip about it either, hes a part of this community, no more or less than anyone else and him not being here is a loss to all of us.
Cliff
??? How could this have happened ??? M&C
It is sad indeed. We have lost too much collective knowledge here over the last couple years. Some taken from us by death, but others simply became uncomfortable posting.
Dallas will be missed greatly around here and I do hope that when he feels comfortable doing so he will return.
Cody and others have said it very well - we need to get back to being the close knit "family" that we once were. It is a fact that there are squabbles within any family. And I'm sure there always will be here. But at the end of the day we need to all remember that we are a "family" of bus nuts.
I've been a member for about two and a half years I guess and was a lurker for longer than that before joining. Of the various groups I tend to like this one maybe a little more, probably because I spent more time here. Probably because believe it or not I thought this group of folks was friendlier. There used to be comments made about how much more friendlier this board was than others, whatever happened to that pride? This forum has chased off many good people lately either in the form of them walking off in anger or just people quietly slipping away. Are we really that big and neat and powerful that we can afford to lose good members? This forum seems to have been taken over lately by grumpy and cantankerous old bastards instead of the fun loving group it should be and I honestly thought it was.
My observations are that while the average age on this forum is well over 35 the attitudes often tend to be more like I see in forums frequented by people well under 35. This applies to both sides of the fence. People need to be both thicker skinned and also more kind. There have been countless flame wars stemming from people insisting that theirs is the ONLY way to approach a problem implying their knowledge to be infinite. There have been far too many flame wars over politics which in my opinion have zero place in this forum. That's not what I come for and I don't want to read others political views here. It's been said that as adults we should allow the political discussion but that really hasn't seemed to work out well has it? I've never seen it work in any other forum either including political forums.
Another forum I'm a member of will lock or delete political discussions instantly in order to keep peace and it works, we only discuss cars which is the point of the forum.
People come to a forum to discuss the topic of the forum and other topics should probably be left out.
Another issue I've noticed is the constant ego based scab picking where someone will have a blow up with someone else and then for weeks, months or even years later will pick and pick and pick at that person at every opportunity just to sooth a wounded ego. Even to an outsider these jabs are obvious and yet the offenders are not warned nor are the words deleted and this seems to feed the frenzy. Everyone knows they can sneak one in here and there and nothing will happen. I've noticed times when my own threads were hijacked within 2-3 replies by warring parties using my thread as a ground to make further war on. In the end I got nothing helpful and regretted even posting. Yes, I'm also one no who posts less and tries to go other places for my answers before asking in here.
Yet another issue is the ever arrogant, magical, mythical and ever changing bar which we are all supposed to live up to in order to own a bus. I've seen it countless times, "if you can't and won't do this like I do then you shouldn't even own a bus...." How about if we all allow each other to do these beasts as they see fit? Isn't the point of this forum to read and learn better ways? If there is only one way then what's the point? I only say that if you can't or won't pay the money to buy a bus then you probably shouldn't own one. The rest is negotiable over time. That seems to be how 99% of us do it.
I think that if everyone just tried to keep in mind that we are a pretty strange and unique group for our interest in buses and band together as a band of brothers in the interest of our buses and recommit ourselves to helping each other here or in person it would go a long way towards re-cementing the bond that we should all have.
I've had Dallas snap at me a time or two in the past, he can be that way and there are some mitigating factors but I didn't take it personally. Dallas was..IS a tremendous asset to this group. Dallas is a good man, I've never met him but I've spoken to him many times and we cannot afford to lose him or the others like him including ones who war with him, you are all valuable to guys like me. We've had some clowns come and go which really didn't contribute to the group but Dallas more than contributed. Dallas has forgotten more than I'll ever know about these things.
How about if we all man up ( or woman up ) and grow another layer of skin and how about if we all stop the petty fights and attacks and work instead to build this group into what it should and could be?
Whewww,watch that first step off the soap box. It's tricky!!
This forum has already lost some of its value as many very knowledgeable busnuts have left. There are a dozen or two who have left and some that haven't left, but no longer post anything.
Unfortunately, I can't give any input on two strokes or older buses because I don't have a two stroke and my bus is fairly new by busnut standards.
Well folks,
Its gotta be hard to be a moderator and a contributor at the same time. Its also hard to be a jack of all trades and knowing when you are out of your element is important. Hopefully Dallas had outside infuences that were upsetting him that he will recover from, and he will return soon with a more relaxed attitude.
I don't feel he has made any lasting enemies I'm aware of. Perhaps without the burden of being a moderator Dallas will return and continue to share his valued experiences with us.
Dallas is an old Trucker who knows his way around and I know he's not going to let the small stuff upset him for very long. Getting kicked around is a way of life in Trucking and anyone who thinks Dallas will stay down or angry for long is really betting against the odds.
Larry
Dallas or Cat;
If you are reading this please contact me.
Thank You
Don
I hope I did not have anything to do with it. If I did I am sorry and take back anything that may have offended him or anyone else. I was born with my foot in my mouth. He seemed like an Icon here and I really loved reading his posts. He has forgotten more than I know.
Guys,
I just read this. Pity I can't agree with nearly every blessed post as it was posted cause then the number of posts would be doubled. Luvr....Cliff....that means, translates, I agreed with each. ??? LOL LOL
Dallas and Cat would have a spot next to my house and I would install 220V and a sewer connection just for them.....as a friend did for me long ago. I have absolutely no space to do that, tough, at this time. I value a mans history and I really hate to hear "so what have you done for me lately?". Maybe being a Vet has something to do with that but I can vividly remember having that mindset as a teenager. Dallas fits that mold for me. He is known to have been of great help to many that were in need and many that only "wanted" help. He has been generous, as i have observed and heard, with his assistance and good council. Sometimes a guy will assume that if he has expertise in one area then he has it in all and he is impatient with any perceived criticism. I can tolerate a lot of that when it is directed at me personally. The rub comes when an innocent is maligned unjustly. I see that intolerance in quite a few on this board and I am proud to associate with you anywhere and any time.
It was said here that people can't see your body language in this mode of communication and that is true. Much more so for some than others. It is called a flat medium. In the past, professionally, I have had people say to me that what I wrote was harsh in the extreme but they had "assumed" another interpretation because they knew me and believed that I would not have said anything like that even though they were looking at it in black and white. When asked in person, and hearing my explanation, they agreed it had gone right past them and I had to agree that they were correct in suspecting. It is my shortcoming and suggesting that someone "ask" before assuming the worst has never born much fruit. People seem to be spring loaded to the offended position often.
About me. And I know this post isn't, per se. I have only nearly been arrested twice in my life and both those cops had the cuffs out. That I wasn't is in no way thanks to my efforts. The first was a summer evening when I was getting gas at the neighborhood filing station. I watched a man repeatedly slap and punch his 5'2" wife and tear a 4 year old boy from her arms. A couple men on the scene were trying to calm this guy down but he was in full rage. I watched as a friend, only a couple days out of appendectomy surgery, went across the street to try and talk sense. For his trouble he was kicked in the stomach. The guy went over to his camper holding the child by the arm at the shoulder, he opened the door and to my horror he threw the child thru the rear door OVERHAND and I heard the kid hit in the front of the camper with a blood curdling scream. I started walking towards the scene, not running, the world became silent and my mind was still. He was still hitting his wife to keep her from going to her child. I nearly beat him to death with my bare hands. He had a fractured neck, concussion, broken jaw broken ribs and internal bleeding. I ended with throwing him in a culvert. Still, after a half hour, he was up and leaning against his truck but not coherent. The sheriff arrived and arrested him and cuffed him in the cruiser. Taking his report I just stood there and looked at the sheriff. When he came to the part about "who did this to your husband, Ma'am?", she said it had been a short stocky Mexican that had run up the road. Two others in attendance hurriedly reiterated her story. When he finished his notes he stood very still and looked at me for a full 30 seconds before he left with his prize. He knew! I was 6 foot tall, 185 and white. No one ever said anything to me except "Thank you, John".
The second time I was working on my car with the usual gaggle of teenagers watching and a neighbor walked up and ,singling out a young boy, proceeded to threaten the kids with a severe beating. I stopped working and asked that he listen to what he was saying to a child. He asked "do you want some of this?". I answered "Yes! I want all you got, stud. I never punched that guy. I slapped him into a 180 maybe 15 times and kicked him in the @$# the same number to get him to turn back around to get reslapped. It had to look comical. My neighbors came out in droves for the event of my pending arrest for assult with intent. My neighbors cornered the cops outside my hearing. It turned out that this freak had threatened to shoot kids in the neighborhood and that included my daughters. He said that with a Ruger six shooter on his hip in a holster. Cop (Sergeant) said that my neighbors had all agreed that I was not to be informed of this guys bad deeds for obvious reasons. He also gave me his card and told me that I should call the number he wrote on the back if the "@$# hole" so much as spits on the sidewalk or says "$#!%" in an audible tone. He shook my hand and said it had been his pleasure. Nice guy and he had put the fear of God in the jerk with the threat of 8 counts of threatening a child with a loaded firearm, 8 counts of assault and child endangerment, etc, etc.
I talked to a shrink about these incidents at the VA. He had a lot of long words but it boiled down to I won't tolerate anybody bullying an innocent in my presence and my safety isn't an issue. There is a scene in Lonsome Dove where Tommy Lee Jones beats this horse steeling Army Scout nearly to death and after wards he said "I hate rude behavior in a man....I will not tolerate it". I identified! I am long past ever being able to repeat those performances but the spirit is still there and I suspect it always will be. The things I read being said to Brian, I thought, were mean and unwarranted. As well, Brian was castigated for saying things he never did. But, still, I can go overboard as well and maybe this was one of those times.....maybe. You can be sure of my intention, though.
I doubt Dallas does "sorry" very well. Just strikes me as he wouldn't. I have many friends that can't say that, also. I am a lot like Brian in this regard, I start out with "I think this is right", it is "what I have learned" and "if anybody has conflicting info please share it". That is not to say that you can call me names for expressing an opinion that hasn't been thoroughly researched or might be wrong or discourage others from venturing an opinion. But, if you need to hear it from me....Dallas, I am sorry you are gone. Not so much for my sake but for all on this board that have and might in the future benefit from your sage advice. You are highly valued by many here and you have earned their respect and gratitude. I hope we can sort through how this got started and also how to intercept it. Perhaps we can gain benefit we can apply elsewhere in our lives. I know, speaking for myself now, I need all the help I can get. You can feel free to call me to chat. My phone number is listed with the board and also my emails.
Never forget: Thank God for unanswered prayers. "Welcome back" in case I am not here when you arrive.
Sincerely,
John
Hey Dallas, if your angry because I flipped you off on the freeway yesterday, don't be. I thought it was Cody!
Aw Phooey! Dallas, Phil and Nick were cornerstones of this Board when I was a puppy in this bus business.
Jackie and I met them at the second Timmonsville rally , along with Ace and Susan, and more firends than I can recall in my doddering years.
Cat, bless her heart, is one of the most caring people I've met in years and her passion for posting Birthday wishes will be remembered by so many of us.
Dallas, now there's a paradox. When I first met him it was in the Chat Room. It didn't take long before I felt we were joined at the hip....brothers so to speak...because I'd think of it and he'd mention it. Man! It was S-C-A-R-Y! We just had a lot in common.
And, at Timmonsville, we seemed to cement together. I didn't look toward him as a Mechanic...just another BusNut. Two years ago we went to Kyle's 'Non-Rally' and Jack & Paula Conrad, Ned and Wilma
Sanders and Dallas and Cat followed us back to our home town, Franklin, NC to spend a few days.
Dallas had to make some much needed roadside repairs to the "Jed Klampitt Special" but we made it and had a great 3 days. We even picked and grinned for a while.
There's no question in my mind that they're having hard times....who isn't? But my greatest disappointment is to hear that they've left the Board.
As an 'old timer' I ask them to reconsider because they have so many friends. If they don't return, I wish them well and 'enough'.
NCbob
Lin, it was me, I waved back lol.
Although I havent yet had the pleasure of meeting Dallas, Cat, and a host of other nuts on this forum, I have chatted with plenty of you; Donna and I have also met some really great people that post here as well. Even though we may have not met in person, I feel a friendship with many here that hopefully will continue for years.
Those who have left the board, both unintentionally and also by choice, are missed both for their expertise and willingness to share their knowledge.
Mark
All I have to say is
It's a SHAME!
TOM
Bob You said it all great bunch of friends and a great weekend was spent by all.
uncle ned and wilma
cat is super has to be to put up with dallas
Friends forever
Argh?!?!?
What did I did now? Shoot just blame me everyone else does! ;D BK ;D
Dallas & Cat you know the name, #, & location! sincerely! B.E.G. Jr.
Well Dallas if you are reading all of these good posts...If you are...we need that genuine old bus nut to be back here where you most qualify to satisfied us bus nuts.
Anyone who have been seeing & reading this board for a few years will know Dallas is an old pro in the jack of all trade man. He can (and he will if Dallas can be there) do any of the broken down bus nut's problem on the road. He an old mechanic pro with a heavy heart. He is not afraid to tackle a new problem. I am sure he does this effort to gain more knowledge.
I never met Dallas & Cat but I can relate to him because Dallas shows his desire to help anyone if all possible. Nobody is perfect but he will correct anything if it not right.
Quote from: Dallas on May 15, 2006, 01:10:38 PM
OK,
I've been asked about a dozen times to postpictures of my bus. You asked for it, You got it! She ain't pretty but she's mine!
that being said, I've had a few people tell me that they don't want to bring their buses to a Rally, ANY rally because they aren't done, or they aren't up to snuff, or they did it their way, or, or , or.....
Heeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeessssss, MILLIE!
Heeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeessssss, MILLIE! (http://www.busconversions.com/bbs/index.php?action=dlattach;topic=2547.0;attach=2366;image)
My definition of a bus nut is a person who loves to own a bus to have the freedom to travel and live in wherever it is parked without any fancy wheel or paint job or whatsoever.
To me...Dallas & Cat are most qualifying as in the category of the Bus-Nut.
Gerald & Lynette
BTW...about the lost bus manuals in your computer...I have only the OEM hard copy of GMC PD-4107/4908 and photo-copy MCI-8 shop and OEM MCI- 9 parts manual. I can scan anything you need and sent.
Dallas and Cat,
Come back home we miss you,,
Tami and John..
I'm still here, never left. My being gone is just wishful thinking on the part of some. ;D
Cat,
Glad to see ya'll are still here. Pleasae tell Dallas I asked him to re-consider leaving the BB. Jack
Look on the bright side, we still got the purty one lol.
What Cody said, x2
Hopefully, Dallas just needs a little time to rejunivate his batteries and he will return fully charged and ready to go. Sometimes, we all feel like everything is just piling up on us and we need a breather. Jack
I agree Jack, well written. I've wanted to call him, but felt best to let the dust settle and just let him do what is best for him. We have no idea why, we don't need to know, all we can do is offer our friendship!
Paul
Quote from: Dreamscape on August 20, 2009, 09:40:08 AM
I agree Jack, well written. I've wanted to call him, but felt best to let the dust settle and just let him do what is best for him. We have no idea why, we don't need to know, all we can do is offer our friendship!
Paul
Amen!
Dallas...We'll wait for ya until the dust settle.
In the mean time, here a little of
Boxcar Willie singing in Branson (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Qdxgam-xE4).
We will be standing by.
Gerald & Lynette
I've been in this bus thing for a year and found this forum about a year ago. Maybe I finally am not a newbie!! I tend to try and stay in the background unless I have something to add to. I'm adding something this time. This forum can't lose someone the likes of Dallas. Much as Jack Conrad, luvrbus, BK, Nick and many others. I have learned so much just by reading. I may post a question and get several peoples outlooks but eventually I get the right one. It may be one of the above's or someone else. Dallas would do anything to help out a fellow bus nut. I sure hope he returns soon. Later
Me, too!
Tom Caffrey
Hi all,
I have a brighter outlook on life this morning. I cleaned my glasses.
Maybe that will work for others!
Sam 4106